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Never let it be said that ground crews and
engineers lack a sense of humor. Here are some actual logged maintenance
complaints by QANTAS pilots and the corrective action recorded by mechanics. By
the way, Qantas is supposedly the only major airline that has never had an
P: Left inside main tire almost needs
P: Test flight OK, except autoland very rough.
P: Something loose in cockpit.
P: Dead bugs on windshield.
P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a
P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
P: IFF inoperative.
P: Suspected crack in windscreen.
P: Number 3 engine missing. (note: this was for a
piston-engined airplane;the pilot meant the engine was not running smoothly)
P: Aircraft handles funny.
P: Radar hums.
P: Mouse in cockpit.